He appeared and the soul felt its worth

 

O Come, O Come Emmanuel

O come, O come, Emmanuel,
And ransom captive Israel,
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear.

Rejoice! Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, O Israel.

O come, Thou Wisdom from on high,
Who orderest all things mightily;
To us the path of knowledge show,
And teach us in her ways to go.

O come, Thou Rod of Jesse, free
Thine own from Satan’s tyranny;
From depths of hell Thy people save,
And give them victory over the grave.

O come, Thou Day-spring, come and cheer
Our spirits by Thine advent here;
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night,
And death’s dark shadows put to flight.

O come, Thou Key of David, come,
And open wide our heavenly home;
Make safe the way that leads on high,
And close the path to misery.

O come, O come, great Lord of might,
Who to Thy tribes on Sinai’s height
In ancient times once gave the law
In cloud and majesty and awe.

O come, Thou Root of Jesse’s tree,
An ensign of Thy people be;
Before Thee rulers silent fall;
All peoples on Thy mercy call.

O come, Desire of nations, bind
In one the hearts of all mankind;
Bid Thou our sad divisions cease,
And be Thyself our King of Peace.

index cards

 Okay, I just have to share this!  First allow me to give you some context.  I have dealt with more shame and guilt in the past year and half than ever before in my life.  These past few weeks have really been brutal on my heart.  Tonight I came across an old journal entry by accident.  Don't you just love it when that happens!?  I do.  Okay, so I wrote it below for you to read.  Wow, my mind is so blown by God's faithfulness.  I really needed to be reminded of this. May it encourage you as it did me.

 March 15, 2009

I was in a room. It was white. There were file cabinets as far as the eye could see. Stacked to the ceiling. I opened one of the drawers. Inside there were index cards. On the index cards was written all the evil things I had done. On each card was the sin, the time, date and place committed. Every single sin I had ever committed was written on an index card. I had lots of index cards. I began reading them. As I read them a sting of guilt and sorrow went through the veins in my body. I sobbed until I couldn't breathe. I sobbed and sobbed over them, such sorrow overcame my being. This man walked up to me. I was so embarrassed because it was obvious I had been crying. He looked at me, then at the cards I had pulled out and were now spread all over the floor. He began to read each and every one. There is no greater shame a human can endure. I was so disgusted with myself. I'm not sure how but I know he knew they were things I had done. I hid my face with my hands, too ashamed to look him in the face. Then He did the unthinkable. He took a red pen from his coat pocket. He drew an X on the card and signed his name. He did this for each one. Each time he got some kind of injury. Once it was stripes across his back, the blood seeped through his shirt. Then it was marks on his face, like he had been struck many times over. Next it was around the top of his head. Like thorns had punctured his head. Though the pain on himself kept coming, he kept writing his name on my index cards. With each one he said to me "I love you, won't you love me back?" "I love you, love those around you in the same way" "I love you, talk to me" "I love you, spend some time with me today in my word" "I love you, now love me in return" He finished the cards after what seemed like ages. Then he took me in his arms and gave me a power hug if I've ever had one! He wiped my tears and when I looked at him again, I only saw scars. He said "follow me" then he walked away and I followed him. I strayed from Him sometimes and I still made index cards. Oh trust me, I still made them. But he was always there, waiting to welcome me back. Waiting to remind me of his never ending love.

Come Thou Long Expected Jesus

Come, Thou long expected Jesus
Born to set Thy people free;
From our fears and sins release us,
Let us find our rest in Thee.
Israel's Strength and Consolation,
Hope of all the earth Thou art;
Dear Desire of every nation,
Joy of every longing heart.

Born Thy people to deliver,
Born a child and yet a King,
Born to reign in us forever,
Now Thy gracious kingdom bring.
By Thine own eternal Spirit
Rule in all our hearts alone;
By Thine all sufficient merit,
Raise us to Thy glorious throne.

- Charles Wesley, 1774

a new season

Well, Thanksgiving came and went.

The holiday shoppers extracted every last door buster on that glorious Friday.

ABC Family did a count down to the count down to the 25 Days of Christmas.

And now it's December 2nd.

This is the first holiday season where I feel more sad than joyful.

Last year's Christmas season was emotional, yes.

My beloved cousin got married.

I turned 21.

My best friend came home after being gone 11 months.

But those were all good things.  Emotional, yes; but good.

This Christmas season, a part of my heart is missing.  I buried her this past summer.  It may sound crazy, but I can't wrap my mind around a Christmas Day without her.  I cried a lot over Thanksgiving, because I miss her so much.

This Christmas season, I will choose to be thankful in the moments when I want to wallow in my self pity.  

I am thankful that my parents are alive. 

I'm thankful I did not lose a grandparent this year.  

I am thankful for each of my brothers, 

and the laughter we will share over the holidays.  

I am thankful for Jesus,

and everything He is.

"Be joyful always."

-1 Thessalonians 5:16