Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate...
and the Master so gently said,
"Wait."
"Wait? you say wait?"
my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers,
I need to know why!"
Is you hand shortened?
Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and
I'm claiming your Word.
My future and all to which I relate
hangs in the balance,
and you tell me to wait?"
I'm needing a 'yes,'
a go-ahead sign.
Or even a 'no,'
to which I'll resign.
You promised, dear Lord,
that if we believe,
we need but to ask,
and we shall receive.
Lord, I've been asking,
and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking!
I
need
a
reply!
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate,
as my Master replied again, "wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
and grumbled to God,
"So, I'm waiting...
for what?"
He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes
met with mine...and He tenderly said
"I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and
darken the sun. I could raise the dead
and cause mountains to run.
I could give all you seek
and
pleased you would be.
You'd have what you want,
but
you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know
the depth of My love
for each saint.
You'd not know
the power I give
to the faint.
You'd not learn to see
through clouds of despair;
you'd not learn to trust
just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy
of resting in Me
when darkness and silence
are all you can see.
You'd never experience
the fullness of love
when the peace of My spirit
descents like a dove.
You would know that I give,
and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth
of the beat of My heart.
The glow of My comfort
late into the night,
the faith that I give
when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond
getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who
makes what you have last.
You'd never know should
your pain quickly flee,
what it means that My grace
is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams
overnight would come true,
but, oh, the loss, if you missed
what I'm doing in you.
So, be silent, my child,
and in time you will see
that the greatest of gifts
is to truly know Me.
And though oft My answers
seem terribly late,
My most precious of answer
of all is still...
"Wait."

By: Russell Kelfer

And they, will not be weary

It is with a full heart and tear filled eyes that I write you tonight. The Lord's goodness is overwhelming to my soul. His glory is so great. I wonder if I can bear it. My flesh wonders "could You really be this good? Could you really love me this way? this much? this deeply? this beautifully?" The sweet answer to those questions is a joyous yes, yes He can. Tonight, I had the joy of seeing Isaiah 40:31 played out right before me. Like a beautiful orchestra in a rainstorm.

But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." - Isaiah 40:31

I've told you before that waiting for God is hard for me. I want Him to move in my time, not His. Last night I dreamed about Africa, so it has especially been in the forefront of my mind today. My heart is broken for the people in Japan. And things are happening everyday to people who do not know my Lord! and it really kills me on the inside. But, whenever I go down this trail with God (of me being unhappy where I am and wanting to move) He never fails to come through. I know in the deepest part of my body that Berry is where God wants me, but man it is easy to forget that. It is easy to become discouraged. Especially when you start comparing yourself with those around you. I found out today that three more of my friends will be doing missionary work during the summer and fall. I really am ecstatic for them and the things that they are going to get to do. But my flesh is jealous. I could very easily get angry at God for not working out the things I want to see happen (and trust me, I certainly have in the past). But today, He gave me the grace I needed to just come pour my heart out to Him. To tell Him again how burdened my heart feels for Africa, for children, for people.

Tonight, His word came. And I want to share it with you.

"It makes God's heart happy like nothing else to see His child be willing to wait for Him. He is not holding out on you. He has not forgotten you."

This word came to me through a dear friend at the most unexpected moment you could imagine. Let it encourage you if you are also waiting on the Lord. If you don't feel encouraged, ask Him to encourage your heart. Then expect Him to act.

Waiting is such a hard thing. But oh it is so necessary. I'm in my own mission field right now. It just doesn't look the way I expect it to. He is preparing me. He is molding me. He is shaping me. He loves me. How could I ask for anything more?

"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him" -1 Corinthians 2:9

Faith

<sup>God has been revealing to me just how small my faith in Him really is. I don't trust Him the way I should. But, instead of writing about that. I've decided to share some scripture with you that talks about faith. Let it convict your heart. Try reading it with new eyes. Ask God to give you a fresh perspective. God is the one who gives us faith. (Yep, He gets the credit for that one too). Don't let this make you feel condemned. There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1). Let it wow your heart. Then, join me in praying, Lord, increase our faith!


1</sup> Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see. ² This is what the ancients were commended for.

³ By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God’s command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.

⁴ By faith Abel brought God a better offering than Cain did. By faith he was commended as righteous, when God spoke well of his offerings. And by faith Abel still speaks, even though he is dead.

⁵ By faith Enoch was taken from this life, so that he did not experience death: “He could not be found, because God had taken him away.” For before he was taken, he was commended as one who pleased God. ⁶ And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.

⁷ By faith Noah, when warned about things not yet seen, in holy fear built an ark to save his family. By his faith he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousness that is in keeping with faith.

⁸ By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going. ⁹ By faith he made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country; he lived in tents, as did Isaac and Jacob, who were heirs with him of the same promise. ¹⁰ For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God. ¹¹ And by faith even Sarah, who was past childbearing age, was enabled to bear children because she^b]"> considered him faithful who had made the promise. ¹² And so from this one man, and he as good as dead, came descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as countless as the sand on the seashore.

¹³ All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance, admitting that they were foreigners and strangers on earth. ¹⁴ People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. ¹⁵ If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. ¹⁶ Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.

¹⁷ By faith Abraham, when God tested him, offered Isaac as a sacrifice. He who had embraced the promises was about to sacrifice his one and only son, ¹⁸ even though God had said to him, “It is through Isaac that your offspring will be reckoned.”^c]"> ¹⁹ Abraham reasoned that God could even raise the dead, and so in a manner of speaking he did receive Isaac back from death.

²⁰ By faith Isaac blessed Jacob and Esau in regard to their future.

²¹ By faith Jacob, when he was dying, blessed each of Joseph’s sons, and worshiped as he leaned on the top of his staff.

²² By faith Joseph, when his end was near, spoke about the exodus of the Israelites from Egypt and gave instructions concerning the burial of his bones.

²³ By faith Moses’ parents hid him for three months after he was born, because they saw he was no ordinary child, and they were not afraid of the king’s edict.

²⁴ By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be known as the son of Pharaoh’s daughter. ²⁵ He chose to be mistreated along with the people of God rather than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin. ²⁶ He regarded disgrace for the sake of Christ as of greater value than the treasures of Egypt, because he was looking ahead to his reward. ²⁷ By faith he left Egypt, not fearing the king’s anger; he persevered because he saw him who is invisible. ²⁸ By faith he kept the Passover and the application of blood, so that the destroyer of the firstborn would not touch the firstborn of Israel.

²⁹ By faith the people passed through the Red Sea as on dry land; but when the Egyptians tried to do so, they were drowned.

³⁰ By faith the walls of Jericho fell, after the army had marched around them for seven days.

³¹ By faith the prostitute Rahab, because she welcomed the spies, was not killed with those who were disobedient.^d]">

³² And what more shall I say? I do not have time to tell about Gideon, Barak, Samson and Jephthah, about David and Samuel and the prophets, ³³ who through faith conquered kingdoms, administered justice, and gained what was promised; who shut the mouths of lions, ³⁴ quenched the fury of the flames, and escaped the edge of the sword; whose weakness was turned to strength; and who became powerful in battle and routed foreign armies. ³⁵ Women received back their dead, raised to life again. There were others who were tortured, refusing to be released so that they might gain an even better resurrection. ³⁶ Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. ³⁷ They were put to death by stoning; they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated— ³⁸ the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground.

³⁹ These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised, ⁴⁰ since God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.

Hebrews 1

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Let Faith Arise

This song has been on my mind and in my heart today. Let it bless you.

Be still, there is a healer
His love is deeper than the sea
His mercy, it is unfailing
His arms are a fortress for the weak

Let faith arise
Let faith arise

I lift my hands to believe again
You are my refuge, You are my strength
As I pour out my heart, these things I remember
You are faithful, God, forever

Be still, there is a river
That flows from Calvary's tree
A fountain for the thirsty
Pure grace that washes over me

So let faith arise
Let faith arise
Open my eyes
Open my eyes

I lift my hands to believe again
You are my refuge, You are my strength
As I pour out my heart, these things I remember
You are faithful, God

You are faithful, God, forever

Let Faith Arise
By Chris Tomlin

Jesus in my psychology class...

I am taking a psychology class on child development this year. My professor, though slightly crazy, is pretty awesome. But oh man, seems like most days I just sit through class and the only thing going through my mind is "wow, God. It is amazing that you created us this way!" I have learned so many things that make scripture where God calls us His children even more amazing! For example...

1. Did you know that you should sleep in the same bed as your baby until the little booger is about 18 months (or has reached a concrete level of thinking)? Putting babies in a separate room as mom before they are thinking concretely is basically making that baby believe mom is no more.

2. If you sleep in the same bed as your baby, mom and baby's heart rate will become in sync with one another.

3. Mom's milk is the best stuff on the planet for baby. Via their madre, the baby will receive the perfect amount of calories, proteins, fats, carbohydrates, vitamins, minerals, etc.

4. To most of us a room full of crying babies just sounds like screams and tears, but to mom she can pick out which cry is her baby.

These are just a few of the awesome things I'm learning. And through these things I saw lots of parallels...

1. In the beginning of walking with Jesus, He shows Himself. He gives you the foundation you need before that trial or hardship. He teaches you that He is there.

2. (This one is SO cool!) If we walk with Jesus. We go where He goes. We do what He does. We follow Him. Our heart will begin to look like His heart. Our heart will sync with His.

3. Jesus is all we need. period. He is the sum of the Father's love for us. He is perfect. We chase after other things, but all they do is make us sick. He knows how to fill us, we just have to be open to it.

4. God hears your cries. He knows each of your tears. Isn't that amazing? The God of all creation hears it when you cry. Sometimes I feel guilty when I go to God about things that are "small" in comparison to the rest of the world. I mean, after all, I'm just one voice in a sea of pain. I am only one rain drop in a rainstorm that fills our world. But, God still hears me. He can recognize my cry, just like a mother in a room full of crying babies. And the coolest thing is, He can recognize your cry to. It is a crazy thing for me to wrap my head around, but God can see, hear, and attend to all of us at one time.

I have been praying for sometime that God would break my heart for what breaks His. That I would love humanity the way He does. That my hands and feet would go where He goes. Well, in my psy class we have also talked about the importance of physical touch for babies. For a child who is not touched, their brain will not develop. They will not grow. They die. This broke my heart so deeply! I cried out to God "here I am Lord! Send me!" To love the unwanted, untouched children of the world! This is my passion and my heart's deepest desire. But, God came with a response just this morning to my constant pleas. "I have children around you right now who need to be touched. It is MY touch that saves them. Not yours." If we as a church body, do not raise up and touch the lost and the hurting they will perish. Not that it is us that saves them. But that is our calling! That is our mission! To reach out and touch! To be Jesus' hands to the ones who are so desperate for Him and may not even know it. We call ourselves His body. Let it be so.

My heart is still broken over the orphans in the world who will not develop because no one will ever touch them. I am still eager and desperate to go to them. But, until He gives the word, I will stay where I am and touch those I am around. Won't you do the same?