It is with a full heart and tear filled eyes that I write you tonight. The Lord's goodness is overwhelming to my soul. His glory is so great. I wonder if I can bear it. My flesh wonders "could You really be this good? Could you really love me this way? this much? this deeply? this beautifully?" The sweet answer to those questions is a joyous yes, yes He can. Tonight, I had the joy of seeing Isaiah 40:31 played out right before me. Like a beautiful orchestra in a rainstorm.
But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." - Isaiah 40:31
I've told you before that waiting for God is hard for me. I want Him to move in my time, not His. Last night I dreamed about Africa, so it has especially been in the forefront of my mind today. My heart is broken for the people in Japan. And things are happening everyday to people who do not know my Lord! and it really kills me on the inside. But, whenever I go down this trail with God (of me being unhappy where I am and wanting to move) He never fails to come through. I know in the deepest part of my body that Berry is where God wants me, but man it is easy to forget that. It is easy to become discouraged. Especially when you start comparing yourself with those around you. I found out today that three more of my friends will be doing missionary work during the summer and fall. I really am ecstatic for them and the things that they are going to get to do. But my flesh is jealous. I could very easily get angry at God for not working out the things I want to see happen (and trust me, I certainly have in the past). But today, He gave me the grace I needed to just come pour my heart out to Him. To tell Him again how burdened my heart feels for Africa, for children, for people.
Tonight, His word came. And I want to share it with you.
"It makes God's heart happy like nothing else to see His child be willing to wait for Him. He is not holding out on you. He has not forgotten you."
This word came to me through a dear friend at the most unexpected moment you could imagine. Let it encourage you if you are also waiting on the Lord. If you don't feel encouraged, ask Him to encourage your heart. Then expect Him to act.
Waiting is such a hard thing. But oh it is so necessary. I'm in my own mission field right now. It just doesn't look the way I expect it to. He is preparing me. He is molding me. He is shaping me. He loves me. How could I ask for anything more?
"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him" -1 Corinthians 2:9
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